Waiting
It’s been a while since I’ve updated, so I’m going to do that.
I was having a conversation with my roommate about a week or so ago, and the topic was all that was going on in my life at the moment. Since the new year, I’ve decided to make a lot of changes (as you may have read) and I have been extremely excited for those changes to come to fruition; but I’ve since realized that these decisions are in no way going to happen overnight.
As many of you may know, myself and the concept of Waiting have never been acquainted. I just never have the patience to wait. Yeah, I know patience is a virtue and all that, but I’ve never been fond of not having what I want, when I want it. It’s incredibly difficult for me to imagine that my dreams are not going to be complete for at least six and a half years. SIX AND A HALF YEARS!! Let’s see… six and a half years ago I had just turned 16, was still in high school, playing in a band or two, a virgin in more than one way, and didn’t have any debt whatsoever! Wow, and it won’t be until I’m 29 that I’ll have reached these goals I have set for myself.
With that said, add my more than prominent unwillingness to wait, and I’m having a hard time staying motivated to do anything. I’m bored, stressed and anxious to say the least. Now let’s go back to that conversation. I was talking about everything I just summarized with Chum, and he simply said, “Well dude, it looks like you’re going to have to wait”. I stopped thinking, and just looked at him with a dumb expression, half expecting him to give me another option. That fantasy never came.
So I’ve spent the last week or so trying to come to terms with Waiting. Waiting really isn’t an easy subject to grasp, for me anyway. I feel like I should be able to go out and buy a book on all my goals, then write a free test that gives me the accreditation to be a civil engineer. Ha, I just re-read what I wrote, and even though it came straight from my mind, the notion is ludicrous. I know that, but I don’t like it.
Every day I’m becoming more comfortable with Waiting, considering he’s not going anywhere, and that’s becoming more and more evident every second I’m with him. I’m realizing that Waiting is a part of everyone’s life, and the sooner you accept him as your companion rather than your enemy, you’ll be that much better off. I feel like soon enough, Waiting will introduce me to Wisdom, and Compassion, and Stronger Love. Won’t those be lovely days!
Now, on to the minor progress I’ve been making.
I now have a full-time job, working as a Finishing Salesman for Dick’s Lumber. I’m signed up for two courses starting in May. I’m falling more and more in love with Megan every day. We now have a puppy, which has made our lives both more stressful and joyful at the same time, and I’m going to have some money in my pocket as well as start paying off debt starting this Friday. Huh, just reading that makes being around Waiting so much easier, as you do get to see the positive in focusing on a goal or two. OH, and I have both family and friends coming out to this end of the country in the next five month, which has me overwhelmed with excitement!
Well, I’m off to bed, and am ready to take on another day in my bright future.
Love you all!
